semen claw 2nd album cover

once again. disgusting. but it'll get better.

it's on here (not for the easily offended)

http://www.semenclaw.info

i'm getting annoyed with auto fill on titles.

"theres art and then theres just plain violation of social values
mike is the later" -paul richards.

two things that make me smile

they used to have these bags of confetti that you blew air into and then popped. and i used to wait until my dad was asleep or really relaxed and then i kick the door in and scream "happy new year". and blow the bags up so confetti was raining over him.

and once i was in the kitchen playing with a wet tea towel and i was telling him that even though he had been in the navy and they had taught him towel whipping skills, that i was an amazing towel whipper. and he was like "shut up, i did not learn towel whipping in the navy" and i was like... "well i'll be safe to do this then" and towel whipped him at 1000mph on the knuckles. hahahahahaaa. and he chased me up stairs and i locked myself in the bathroom.

album cover i did for a band.

it's a bit more offensive than i'd ideally like to be doing these days, but you have to do these things.

it's on here (not for the easily offended)

http://www.semenclaw.info

if it doesn't come with chips then you can fuck off...

steak sandwich and chips.
egg bacon fried bread and chips
cheese sandwich and chips? that's getting ridiculous.

that noise when you hold your lips together and blow out. prbrbrbrbrp.

already bored of painting little scenes so i'm now painting a great big picture. it's going to take ages. but that is good because i have nothing else to do. i've already started laying it's foundations. haven't painted any really successful big pictures for a while. and i think i've only ever painted one in my life. but i'm sure i'll grow to not like that one either. because

i


am a


twat.

34 days clean.

e/ye// think/ the/world/is /fall/ingaPART/ but maybe / not// eye/a/m/mellow-DRAMA/TIK

here

i got you something. xx

ptvty/ drops/ frames...

a lunch, studio, mc, mc.

bear on the hood.

looking into the face of god.

disappear once/ a/ day/ sometimes / and others/ make magic/ dream of light/white and pale/ in/unrequited/ screams/of/ my disappear.

not on my mind

my my/ hole/ in/ a /girl/ sometimes in a bucket as an offensive / TERM-a-no-logy/ blar/ i've got / a/ head/ ache.

mourning.

the razor blade is blunt/ the kitchen knife would carve me like steak/ bitter / gut/ punch/ nice to remind me why it happens/ no right path/ drifting/ passive/ negative/ nice to see some blood though.

another painting.

stack/ box case / can desert-ED/ blue black shadow with red white and black symbolism/ it's all/to/much.

new painting

my new painting. it's about two of my friends.

my new paintings.

i finished them all today.

breakfast and other animals

a/delicious form/ of torture/ it's a bit/ like/ being/ sprayed with lemonade/ everytime.

fishing and talking to a horse (2008)

duck joke (2008)

ok. so a duck walks into a bar, goes up to the bartender and says "alright mate? you got any grapes?", the bar tender says "no duck, this is a bar, we don't serve grapes". "oh ok" says the duck and leaves. 5 minutes later he comes back in again. he goes up to the bartender and says "alright mate? you got any grapes?", the bar tender says "no duck, i told you already we don't serve grapes". "oh ok" says the duck and leaves. 5 minutes later he comes back in again. he goes up to the bartender and says "alright mate? you got any grapes?", the bar tender says "what? no. we don't serve grapes, if you come in here again asking for grapes, then i'll nail your beak to the bar...". "oh ok" says the duck and leaves. 5 minutes later he comes back in again. goes up to the bartender and says "alright mate? you got any nails?" the bar tender says "NO!". and the duck says "in which case, i'll have some grapes..."



i did this painting when i was cold turkeying a few weeks ago, but had no camera to document it for the website.

Miami Limb Show (2008)

a painting i did while i had no camera...

3 cat plates

a plate for a child

i like this but it's time for a change

“maybe you hate it here so much you will try anything to escape- to an adandoned garage, to the railroad tracks, to coppers pond. Desire leads you straight to nowhere. You’re high but the streets are ugly and cold. The world “out there” is shrinking. The possibilities of suburbia are exhausted. And your capacity to dream has reached a dead end. But nobody cares, nobody gives a shit”
- Gaines (1991)

Decent image of NFM painting.

here we go. colours are better and it's much clearer.

ho ho ho

well... it looks from first impressions that this phone actually fucking works! NICE.

but i haven't left my house yet. but i have FULL unwaivering signal in my room, that i did not have before. so maybe it was just one from a bad batch of phones.

either way i'm happy now. o2 have slightly redeemed themselves... but if this phone fucks up later on then i will take it back.

so once the phone has charged you can look forward to a resurgence in my pointless photos.

i'm thinking i might not paint anymore because my paintings are fucking garbage. but maybe i'm just in a bad mood towards them. i've been sorting through 7 years worth of paintings today and some of them were absolutely fucking terrible.

REALLY terrible.

oh my.

so o2 have replaced my handset... i'm going to pick it up in a bit. but it's the same kind of handset, so i wouldn't be surprised if it still doesn't fucking work. dickheads. but i may take that back if it works. but this observer doesn't believe it will.

anyway, i'm 19 days clean. i'm going to paint today. i want to try and finish a painting if i can. that would be good. and hopefully i can put a decent picture of it up. if i have a working camera phone again...

watch this space for more o2 hatred.

new painting: nazi fish murderer

this is my new painting.

i've been clean for 15 days. 15 very long days...

photo isn't great. because it's on my old phone. thanks a fucking bunch o2. you sodomites.

14 days

i could write loads of stuff but it'd be all miserable and "poor me".

so i won't write anything.

instead i give you the best graffiti in the world...

13 days

orange drinks,
panty charts,
ceiling fan,
artex horrors,
every room,
is in the house,
hundreds of pictures,
per second,
scribble box,
mouse hat,
objects of interest,
time to cut,
lose some sweat,
splash out some,
i'm tired.

12 days

it's raining outside,
but i'm not made of sugar,
i'm a biscuit now,
with unusual teas,
i breath special air,
i eat brand new food.

10 days

i feel like shit. again. but it'll be ok.

still need to do painting. didn't cut any wood though. so i can't. still can't post any photos because of o2.

now i'm going to have a nice bath and soak in it with my candle. try and relax before i go to sleep.

9 days.

i've been totally clean for nine days. i feel fucking awful. but there you go. i've been painting but i can't seem to get anything finished and i need some small bits of wood that i can have fun with. just paint some silly stuff and have fun with it. hopefully when i see my parents tonight they will give me a hand. because i am shit with a saw and apparently you can't chop MDF with an axe.

i can't post any pictures because o2 still refuse to give me a working phone. until i have sent away my current handset twice. fucking retards.