which side of the train is the side i'm meant to sit on?

the answer is... it depends on which direction you are going.

i just coughed up some onion. weird.

i'm reading an interesting book on abstract expressionism. the more i look at paintings and art i come to realise that it's totally subjective. i mean i've long-known that to be the case, but it's a bit like in platoon where willem dafoe and tom beringer and trying to get charlie sheen to give them a cuddle and he's like oh whatever. so basically i feel a bit like that with conceptualising work and just doing whatever i want. obviously i have to conceptualise stuff to make progress on my degree, but it's actually soul destroying to over-analyse something really nice that you enjoy. like eating crisps. obviously what i do is for a reason, but at the same time i don't want to over burden my brain with anything more than what kind of sandwich i should make. i don't mean that literally. but what i'm getting at is that i'm torn by two camps and i only want to stay in one of them. i.e. making stuff that i want to make. oh i just need to come up with some crap to support me doing what i'm impulsively inclined to do. sometimes i wonder what i'm talking about. there are loads of ideas and theory behind what i'm doing but i'm so scared of being pretentious that i don't want to talk about anything to do with that.

that hedge is a phone box

black isn't dark or depressing or negative. it's a beautiful, warm, dynamic colour. yeah i know it's apparently not a colour, but the rationalisation of world is rubbish. i would like to know why i've got 5 velvet underground cds, but i've only got one album on my ipod. i'm so confused.

i would like to be sponsored by liquitex. their paint is sexy.

chair to sleep in (2009)

departure lounge (2009)

slump area (2009)

abortive attempt to ghost hunt (2009)

i'll have the soup to go

i'm making a painting of a party scene from less than zero. i'm going to do it on loads of different canvasses. thought it might be fun. the timing is interesting for different reasons. i need something a bit more linear to get my teeth into and something grim to appease the current sense of alienation. i wouldn't be the first person to draw comparison from bret easton elis and f.scott fitzgerald. so i won't bother. but i recently saw something interesting about the alienation of money or lifestyle . (not that mine is alienation because of money). but my point is that the comparison of those two is relevant in the bleak observations that blar blar. god i'm boring.

what happens when you aren't slinking (2009)

not the centre (2009)

a corner (2009)

caught in between the uptown scenes

i'm trying to use up the remaining canvases i have left from the pigeon project, which i'm temporarily drawing a line under, because i feel like while there are infinate possibilites for it, it's much more a distraction from what i want to do.

what do i want to do. no idea. so i've kind of gone a bit full circle in a way i think. better materials but i can't help feeling i've been here before. i mean in the sense of what is going on in the images. i'm feeling a bit regressive. which isn't really positive. but then again, maybe i go back to a place of comfort when i'm out of my level ground painting wise. i've been grinding my jaw so my face hurts. so anyway, i totally haven't gone full circle at all. and i think that is a shocking conclusion for me to impose on myself. i just can't seem to make paint make sounds. and that's part of the pinch of trying to do something important to myself, is that i can't make my standards. i can't really make my standards even if i'm doing something more lighthearted (i.e. yf or pigeons).

it's not that i'm making rules, i'm just trying to rationalise things for myself. give myself some helpful parameters to focus my brain, as apposed to firing off in every direction and never hitting anything. it's actually incredibly easy to paint. the issue is painting something of any value to myself (because while i'm a people pleaser, i also need to pat myself on the head) and that's where the struggle is currently situated. classic distractions are leaking in. such as the old "blog moan" tactic. so i think i'll stop dribbling.

shows over

the 2nd year show has ended now. these were the only people who went. and a man with a unicycle but i got him in a choke hold and threw his unicycle into the harbour. he is currently sat on top of a building with a grey towel around his shoulders like batman plotting his revenge.

We're going to make it through this war tonight (2009)

cats pigeons land pigeons

i have a slight concern that the pigeons will be dark / light in the wrong places after firing. we'll see i guess.

. I guess real cats names would be unpronounceable to humans.

awesome

i got a sandwich from the ice cream man

that was a lie. i got it elsewhere. but i did get an ice cream.

clay pigeoninas

started making the pigeons into recognisable pigeon forms today. started the slip work. emphasis on started. i've got loads more to do. got some ideas from contrasting dark and light and dry brush work.

reconstruct me a sandwich

i felt a bit sad so i went for a paddle in the river. i need to do some painting. i was painting until 2am again last night.

i found that if i spend more time on the light work and the individual objects, with colour work before and after inking (essentially two inking sessions) then it makes a really nice effect and gives the drawing more significance.

standing in a river makes your feet cold and the rocks are slippery. but it so nice. sea is so much colder.

interesting? really? yes.

source 1.

Folk art describes a wide range of objects that reflect the craft traditions and traditional social values of various social groups. These art works from 'common folk' are generally produced by people who have little or no academic artistic training, nor a desire to emulate "fine art". In the collectibles and antique industry, these items are categorized by established techniques and styles of a particular region or culture. Along with painting, sculpture, and other decorative art forms, some also consider utilitarian objects such as tools and costume as folk art.

source 2.

The music sub-genre known as anti-folk (or antifolk) takes the earnestness of politically charged 1960s music and subverts it. The defining characteristics of this sub-genre are hard to pin down, as they vary from one artist to the next. Nonetheless, most would accept that the music tends to sound raw or experimental; it also generally mocks the seriousness and pretension of the established mainstream music scene in addition to mocking itself.

.... yeah so maybe i'm antifolk. because my work is apparently like "folk art". although i can't really relate to that in some ways because i don't really have any specific heritage or anything. but i like to use craft techniques and i don't have any desire to make "fine art". i just want to make what i want for whatever reason. impulse art. actually the whole of calling something art seems to over burden it before you even look at it or think about it. my goodness i'm boring myself.

i made my own pizza. and when i say "made my own" i mean "scraped the ham and shit off the top and put on some tuna and sweetcorn".

picture of body dysmorphia

a reproduction of a famous photo. this is art. i'm giving up painting and everything else and i'm just going to do drawings on the computer like this.

self portrait

inside the storm shelter (2009)

pigeons (2009)

oh this is a quick summary for those of you who haven't been paying attention



buy a poster at http://www.cafepress.com/mcrancid.267659153

feeding frenzy (2009)

two pigeons in the rain (2009)

"encounters" private view

i don't really get the title of "our" show. i think it was just one of those vague words that can be applied to most work in some way or another. i'm not sure it was relevant. i should have submitted more work really. like some paintings. i'm still too tired to think about it too much, but my work looked nice and it was fine.

the swell of dust (2009)

the motion of distraction (2009)

my big blue boy (2009)

with a sheen of petrol (2009)

the three pigeoneers (2009)

walking in snow (2009)

yellow brick road (2009)

pecky pecky peck peck

Fluffy head